Hello fitness friends! Tonight I wanted to talk to you about something that will improve your emotional health and wellness. It’s called boundaries.
Boundaries are the parameters we set up with other people to let them know what’s allowed and what is not allowed. Boundaries keep us from being used, violated, mistreated, overworked, or burned out. Stress is a killer. A lack of boundaries leads to stress!
We determine what we allow and what we won’t allow in our lives. We are also called to learn and respect the boundaries of other people.
So how do you establish boundaries? Here are some practical tips.
1. Say no to things that violate your conscience, morals, goals, or are harmful.
Sometimes you have to say no to what’s good to have something that’s great. Every opportunity is not the best opportunity. You have the right to say no.
2. Figure out what makes you uncomfortable and speak your truth.
I’m not advocating complaining, being a know it all, or pushing your opinions on people. I am advocating telling people not to stop by unannounced, to not call after certain times, to keep their hateful opinions to themselves, to mind their own business, to do their own work, to treat you with respect…don’t allow people to dump on you. If you can’t stop the behavior with words, you can walk away. I’ve walked away from people who like to argue or are disrespectful. They can talk to themselves.
3. Set the standard.
People see how you treat yourself and how you talk to yourself. Treat yourself well and as though you are valuable. You have tremendous value and so do others.
4. Don’t let negative or toxic people take up most of your space.
A good way to stop the negativity or complaining is to ask the person, “What are you going to do about your problem?” or “I’d love to hear what’s going well in your life!” There’s nothing wrong with listening to a friend vent. If you continue to allow people to dump their problems on you, you will end up stressed, whether you feel it consciously or not.
5. Seek balance.
Working too much, giving too much, taking too much, eating or drinking too much…all stretch boundaries. Balance and moderation is key. Too much of a good thing can be just as toxic as the wrong thing.
Boundaries don’t make you a diva or a selfish jerk. Boundaries mean you respect yourself and others. The best way to cut back on stress is to set boundaries. Don’t violate others boundaries and don’t allow others to violate your boundaries.
Life requires balance and boundaries. Health requires balance and boundaries. Wishing you a well balanced life!